Apparently the trendies that seem to dictate how us chaps spend our spare time have a new ruse.
Eating flowers.
I kid you not.
A range of edible plants has been tested by Gardening Which? and those in the know have selected the best for taste as well as beauty to add a splash of colour and new flavour to many dishes.
They reckon that there are more than a hundred plants that have edible flowers and they can be used as garnishes, dried to flavour tea, crystallised to decorate cakes, infused in jars of vinegar, added fresh to salads or made into sauces.
The magazine suggests that if we are bored with proper food we should look to our gardens for inspiration. Part of their hare-brained conclusions include adding roses to our cooking. They were used first in medicines and later as stomach-settlers, mouth-fresheners and various natural remedies. Napoleon is reputed to have given his officers bags of rose petals to boil in white wine as a cure for lead poisoning caused by bullet wounds.
Another nutter claims deep-fried marigold with marrow, plus rose petals in jelly and nasturtiums in salad should also be part of our diet.
Let me just fire this warning shot across your bows.
The first time anybody tries to fob me off with a bunch of flowers for my tea, they get a taste of a Size 9 Timpson up their backside.
What on earth is the world coming too?
Look - it ain't rocket science and it's quite simple really. Vegetables are for eating, fruit is for nibbling - and flowers are for giving to the Long Suffering.
End of story!
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