Friday 16 November 2007

A cold 'un!

By the left it's nippy out there!!

I've just come back in from a little session and I can hardly feel my fingers.

With winter well and truly on its way - another frost this morning, I decided to sort out a couple of fruit trees in the garden. You see I used to get a bit of bother from caterpillars - the little buggers used to lay their eggs on the branches and that plays havoc with the foliage, blossom and fruit in the spring.

Then I found a cracking way to spike their fun!

I just apply some glue and grease bands to the trunks of the trees - and that sorts them. You can buy ready-to-use glue or grease bands from your local garden centre - and it really does the trick.

I've also been out giving my roses a last once-over - cutting the climbers back and tieing in any growing tips. Finally, after a bit of nagging from the long-suffering I finally got round to lagging my greenhouse. The boss at Rootgrow let me 'borrow' a whole load of bubble wrap and that should save me a bob or two on my heating bills!

Mind you, there ain't no such thing as a free lunch with old Septic Knuckles - he'll probably squeeeze an hour or two extra out of me for the privelege!!

Monday 12 November 2007

Brrr

It's certainly turned nippy these last few days - but I always say when the nip is in the air, you've just got to work that bit harder. Mind you, you tell this to the kids today!

I had my brother's youngest Kylie-Dido or whatever her name is with us over the weekend. All tattoos and body piercing - just what is that all about? In my view, the only tattoos you should be able to see on a lady are those you shouldn't be able to see.

Anyway she came down with my brother and due to some happening twixt her and our kid she needed to take her mind off things and offered to help me in the garden. To be honest, I'd got loads to do and could have done without company. But as it happens it didn't matter - she spent the whole afternoon muttering 'whatever' and texting countless similarly work-challenged and tattooed mates.

What is the world coming to?

Anyway, it was another day of battening down the hatches. I decided to cleaning and sharpen my old tools beofre storing them carefully for the winter. I have a very careful routine for looking after my tools. First of all I give them a good clean in warm, soapy water and then dry them thoroughly.

All those with wooden handles get a light rub down with a bit of sand paper beofre sharpening then oiling the blades. I then tend to wrap them up in old horse blankets and whilst it might seem a bit excessive, when I take them out again for the spring, they'll be in perfect nick.

So that was my weekend done - I also put away the hoses after rinsing and checking for leaks. Then it was a good tidy of the borders and a sit down in front of the box with a cup of tea and a slab of the long-suffering's Ginger Cake.

And Kylie-Dido just sat there and chewed gum.

Bring back National service, I say.

Monday 5 November 2007

What poppycock!!

Apparently the trendies that seem to dictate how us chaps spend our spare time have a new ruse.

Eating flowers.

I kid you not.

A range of edible plants has been tested by Gardening Which? and those in the know have selected the best for taste as well as beauty to add a splash of colour and new flavour to many dishes.

They reckon that there are more than a hundred plants that have edible flowers and they can be used as garnishes, dried to flavour tea, crystallised to decorate cakes, infused in jars of vinegar, added fresh to salads or made into sauces.

The magazine suggests that if we are bored with proper food we should look to our gardens for inspiration. Part of their hare-brained conclusions include adding roses to our cooking. They were used first in medicines and later as stomach-settlers, mouth-fresheners and various natural remedies. Napoleon is reputed to have given his officers bags of rose petals to boil in white wine as a cure for lead poisoning caused by bullet wounds.

Another nutter claims deep-fried marigold with marrow, plus rose petals in jelly and nasturtiums in salad should also be part of our diet.

Let me just fire this warning shot across your bows.

The first time anybody tries to fob me off with a bunch of flowers for my tea, they get a taste of a Size 9 Timpson up their backside.

What on earth is the world coming too?

Look - it ain't rocket science and it's quite simple really. Vegetables are for eating, fruit is for nibbling - and flowers are for giving to the Long Suffering.

End of story!